'Star Trek' (In All Its Forms)

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'Star Trek' (In All Its Forms)

Apparently, our planet-in-the-future-people prefer sending playas into space. And let me tell you – these ardent ambassadors are more than willing to fulfill our extraterrestrial expectations of human-alien love. Luckily, there is no lack of buxom and beefy booty out there for them to conquer. All these aliens look basically like us. Just us with facial prosthetics and maybe a dye job.

So how's that work? Wouldn't aliens tend to be a little more ... well, alien? I mean, sure, in "Star Trek" you get some funky species now and then, but for the most part, any E.T. encounters involve one-headed, two-armed and two-legged humanoid creatures. Let the games begin!

But statistically speaking, our explorers would be better served by taking a cold shower. The closest they're realistically going to get with another life-form out in space would be a brush with a bacterial infection, and that would make for a real lousy movie. Based on all the research we've done, it's just not that densely populated, especially by humanoids.

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